Archive for the ‘Audio log (Private)’ Category

Breaking point

Aug
2

Everyone has a breaking point, and I have hit mine. I’ve been in hiding for what now, two weeks? Something like that, at least. Operation Platinum Halo ended quite unexpected. I should write the report on that, but I simply lack the willpower to do so.

Gods and spirits, this is frustrating, I need to get myself together again. Before someone gets the bright idea of checking up on how I’m doing. I submitted a vague leave of absence some days after returning to Goinard, saying the loss of the VCS Acquisitio and getting a skill level yanked out of my head had me needing some time to recover. There’s some truth in that, surely, but that ain’t all of it.

Why did I have to go and fall for the most stubborn man in the whole of New Eden? I had no other choice than to come here. Yet the irony of it all, considering the role the Guristas played in his history and how this almost resembles what happened in the past …

Myrhial gives a pained sigh.

He probably doesn’t even realize how much I miss him, even now. In some way, I probably deserved this. Yet all I want is him back by my side. I promised Aria I’d take care of him. Breaking his hart and then crushing the pieces under my boots sure ain’t doing it right.

But I can’t just give up. I’ve learned so much here, but I am not quite done. Just a little longer. Then I can go back to PRETA. The revival of Naraka. A phoenix from its ashes. I have no doubts it will be a success.

Will he return to me then? I am not sure. I’d give so much for it to happen, but I realize I might have wasted all my chances. If only he could see things my way, I am sure he’d understand.

Myrhial takes a deep breath.

Enough ranting, nothing is getting done this way. I’ll rest a little longer and then get back into the action. Finish what I started, and then onwards to the future. I’d let so many more down if I didn’t. And that is not my intent.